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I grasp that I am not the only parent who has experienced the pure heart pounding terror of a teenager getting their drivers licence...I get that anyone who has a drivers licence, probably subjected their parents to hyperventilating moments that needed medical intervention......I understand it's all part of the job, but good gawd all mighty, I'm not sure how much more my heart, knuckles and car can take.

I felt in my gut the day my 16 year old daughter finished driving school would be about as much fun as the one day a year I go to the gynecologist. I was right, except now I get that feeling everyday. I had read the paper work, I knew my part in this whole terrifying deal. "Once your child has passed driving school, they must drive accompanied by an licenced adult for 6 MONTHS before applying for their drivers licence." Oh parental joy...

The first lip quivering pause was vehicle. I own two, a necessity for my lifestyle. One for the mountains, a big tough Dodge truck and the other, a sweet smart little BMW for the city.

I suggested the truck, figuring if we rammed into anything, a tree, a fence, parked cars, moving train, we would have a decent shot at living. But her mouth dropped open and she said, "That big thing, are you kidding? Mom, there's just no way, I'm used to a Subaru from class."

Which brought her eye's and mine (open huge and buggin) to the BMW. Double gulp. Shelby tentatively says, "Wow Mom, do you think I can handle the BMW?" Handle? The only words that came to my mind was smashed, scratched, dented, totaled with a capital T. There's a reason I drive a BMW, it isn't for name, or status, I could care less about such empty illusions. I drive one because they are fast, barely touch the gas peddle zippy fast, turn with the slightest touch, and ride like they are on air. The sort of things a 16 year old need not appreciate.

I make too much noise. That's right, turns out I'm the horror, according to my daughter, to drive with. I gasp audibly with terror etched throughout my face. I grab the dashboard to often, white knuckle style. I suck in air like a fish gasping and dying on the floor boards. I yelp and I whisper cuss words to often. Oh, and I give suggestions, criticism and directions far to much for her sensitive soul.

All that according to the kid I've made cry on more then one driving occasion.

I don't consider myself the sort of Mom who takes great joy in making the kid cry. And I even tried to explain, justify myself and my actions to her.

For Example:

Shelby, I gasped because you were hugging the right side of the road so bad that poor biker had to jump the curb to avoid being laid out flat under the wheels.

Darling, I grabbed the dashboard because you 'paused' ...your word, not the stop sign, and let us not forget stop sign means well...stop the damn car.... and you practically took out that mans utility trailer. By the way, if my hands weren't indented in the dashboard I would have flipped him off, for flipping you off.

Sweetheart, I sucked in air because despite your 'comfortable' speed, when you get on the freeway you must maintain a speed that flows with everyone else. Just because 45 mph feels better for you at that moment, that doesn't mean the Semi-truck coming up the ass-end of the car understands.

Daughter, I yelped and cussed under my breath because first you hit the gas too hard which shot us mock 5 around the corner, at which point in time you froze your turn in the steering wheel, shooting the low clearance BMW along side, into, and onto the sidewalk. At which point in time a show of emitting sparks, and the noise of scratching the entire side of the car will haunt me forever.

And none of us will forget scaring the shit out of 4 people who went flying for cover (now I know how people get run over innocently walking down a sidewalk) ...........and the worst thing about that disaster was your darling back seat driver sister blamed me. I had just answered my cell phone 2 seconds prior to this horror and was mid process of telling the caller I would need to call them back and guess what, that caller got to hear the very reason WHY. Every screech, scrap, scream, swear word....the whole enchilada. Answering my phone for that brief second was not the problem sweet Kaitlyn.

***By the way, I drove home from this experience with both daughters sobbing in the back seat. I think daughter number #2 thought I might murder and bury her sister in the mountains somewhere***

So my fault ehh.....if that's the story you two are sticking to, well then I'm telling my side, not to mention writing the check for the damage.

Honestly, I just want to live, or call a taxi, or hire someone who can contain their 'oh shits' and 'oh gawd we're gonna die's'.... I am not enjoying this entire experience, at all. The interesting thing is, when I got my drivers licence, I came home a spry 15 year old with my licence photo barely dry and my dad gave me a key to the car.

I was off and driving, just like that. Alone (well ok, I'd zoom down the street and pick up 2, or 3 or 4 friends)

There was none of this drive with parents for 6 months agony. I was a pro from day one, surely I was, right? My parents were the lucky ones, they trusted blindly, spared themselves the heart attacks and I suppose just prayed I'd make it home alive each time.

The good old days, when parents weren't legally bound to torture their children as much with suggestions, directions, ohhs and ahhs~~

22 Additional Thoughts:

We have permits for a year here... My son, Hammer, is 16, but doesn't feel ready to drive yet. Thank the gods...

Thanks for the laugh... and terror...

be well...

October 21, 2008 12:43 PM  

I escaped this terror fest. I don't drive *gasp* yeah I know got the list of why nots already. Paul taught Skye in our truck. She complained the wheel turned too slow for her to make turns. I know when Paul would come home his face would be white and he would go upstairs cursing under his breathe, plug his guitar into his amp and crank it.

In the end we paid for someone to teach her to do a K-park. It just wasn't happening with Paul. Now she drives all over creation, lives in PA and does the 45 min. drive back and forth to work.

I know it wasn't funny...oh hell yeah it was (it's the way you wrote it)...Here's to hoping some sanity can be found and the BMW stays in one piece. (Hugs)Indigo

October 21, 2008 2:32 PM  

Lesson one: Go out and buy a five hundred dollar beater for your daughter to drive. That way, if she totals it, it won't be the end of the world, either emotionally or financially. Plus, they go slower. Don't worry about it breaking down. Just tell her she'd be smart to not drive it somewhere she can't catch a bus if she has to.

October 21, 2008 2:39 PM  

I think your system is better than ours. When our teenagers pass their test at the age of seventeen they are let loose on the roads by themselves, nobody has to be with them.

October 21, 2008 3:31 PM  

Sounds like a harrowing experience :o)

Thanks for stopping by my blogspot.

October 21, 2008 4:26 PM  

You are my hero and have become one of my Favorite Reads! Don't you wish there was someone made of stone to take over these very responsiblities along with a car made of the same? I shall return to see how the rest of everyone fares. Thank you for your visit and your link back here! I shall return. Take care of you and all of yours,

October 21, 2008 7:40 PM  

Hi. Thank you for visiting my blog! Better to teach them right than to set them loose with no clue!

October 21, 2008 10:32 PM  

Having a teenager in the home with a driving license is a scary proposition! My youngest son wrote his car off a couple of months ago. Thank goodness he wasn't hurt. In Canada they aren't allowed to drive after a certain hour at night and not on certain motorways. Don't ask me how they make sure this doesn't happen! It boggles the mind!

October 22, 2008 12:54 AM  

oh boy... hang in there Rebecca.

October 22, 2008 4:08 AM  

Rent a car or wreck. They have those now. Save your car and buy some hair dye to color all those grays.

October 22, 2008 1:19 PM  

I can relate! My son has his license and my daughter has her road test in a week. You can imagine the knot in my stomach. I remember thinking how cool it would be when the day came when they would be able to drive. What the heck was I thinking?! Good luck to you and your daughter and may she always be safe.

October 22, 2008 6:16 PM  

I can imagine the aprehension having your kid learn to drive and teaching them. I don't even have kids yet. May I say that you don't look at all old enough to have children at that age. Anyway, have a happy Thursday. : )

October 22, 2008 9:06 PM  

Rebecca Anne,
Oh how I know the feeling. My youngest just purchased his own 17 years old. My oldest started out with a $500 beater and drove it without a scratch. Now let's see what his younger brother does whith his own money.

October 22, 2008 9:07 PM  

Rebecca Anne,
Oh how I know the feeling. My youngest just purchased his own 17 years old. My oldest started out with a $500 beater and drove it without a scratch. Now let's see what his younger brother does whith his own money.

October 22, 2008 9:07 PM  

Oh boy...been there, although I suffered on the sidelines as I have never learned how to drive myself. Yeah, I'm one of "those" Big on taxis, walking, subways and such. My kids actually drove pretty well, my youngest son had a heavy foot, did have two accidents minor ones thank god but this is why we get grey hair my friend...hang in there - just tell them their turn will, Sandi

October 23, 2008 8:15 AM  

Ohmahgosh...too funny. Okay, you and the girls may not see the humor in it now...but believe me it is funny.
As my parent's told me when my son cut off my daughters pony tail (for the 2nd time) day you'll look back on this and laugh. I don't exactly laugh out loud, but it is a good story to tell.
Print a copy of this day you'll want your daughter to read it when she comes back from taking her child on that first driving experience.

October 27, 2008 8:33 AM  

Hey, I survived it, you can too. Of course, Son learned in my Crown Vic(big, monster of a car) not a BMW.
I recommend deep breathing exercises! Hang in there, Mom!
:) Leigh

October 29, 2008 9:11 PM  

Deliciously told....and you are now learning that it is far mor difficult growing older than it is to be growing up!

Buckle up!
Peace Alwys...Marc :)

October 30, 2008 8:07 PM  

Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!

January 10, 2010 11:21 PM  


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